Flying the Coop

April 24, 2009

Rebecca’s boyfriend has been working at the local Outback Steakhouse for ten years.  He started as a server and worked his way up to kitchen manager.  The next step was to become a proprietor.  A few days ago, he was offered proprietorship of an Outback about three hours from here.  He has to move to the new location within three weeks.

Accepting this offer means that Matt’s salary will be doubled.  In fact, at the age of 28, he will be earning more than Daniel and I do combined.

Rebecca and Matt’s relationship is very serious.  I fully believe that they will get married.  So, it comes as no surprise that Rebecca is going to move with her boyfriend.

Of course, I am thrilled for Matt.  This is an incredible opportunity.  On the other hand, I am feeling very emotional about having to say goodbye to my daughter.

I am well aware of the fact that children grow up and move away from home.  I know that this is a normal part of life, and parents all over the world have to deal with similar situations.  In many cases, children move much farther away.  But knowing these things doesn’t make it any easier for me.

I love having an empty nest.  I just wish my wings weren’t clipped (by not driving) so that I could fly away to visit more often than I will be able to.  The train ride is five hours long, and that’s very difficult for me to endure because of my pain.  So I won’t be seeing my firstborn daughter very often.

My heart hurts.

Song of the Day: Empty Nest Theme Song


13 Responses to “Flying the Coop”

  1. LA said

    Oh, oh, oh! Wonderful/terrible news! Up or downstate?

    Gads, don’t you wish they’d tell you this stuff when you’re pregnant instead of dumb advice about cocoa butter and cloth diapers? “A little FYI, after spending 20+ years of sacrifce, love, worry, expense, joy, fury, and endless messes, your child will abruptly become an adult and make a life for herself. Which will be great and be heart scalding.”

    Hugging you, ~LA

  2. Stefani said

    I’m glad she’s moving for such a good reason though – not some loser douchebag!

    I know you’ve told us when and why you quit driving – but have you considered giving it another go?

  3. Sasha said

    I have to be honest, my forgetful mind has forgotten why you don’t drive. Could you perhaps learn again? Even so, a three hour drive can be tiring. I’m glad to hear your daughter is with a good man with a bright future but sad that the news is bittersweet for you because of the distance. 😦

  4. Oh this is so hard. I hope she has time to come visit you.But I am glad that she has such a good boyfriend.

  5. LeAnn said

    I love LA’s comment! This is definitely the thing they need to prepare you for!! I know it’s hard and it’s going to be a difficult adjustment. Time will make it easier and it already is much easier than it was before emails and cell phones and all the other ways we have to instantly communicate these days. Just don’t hold back your feelings. You’ll need to work through this in order to adjust. Congrats to Matt. He sounds like a great guy!

  6. terri t. said

    What a wonderful opportunity for Matt…and in these tough times; it is a real good thing. Of course, losing your daughter close proximity is the sad part. What does she do for a living and will she be able to find work there as well?
    Like others said, with all the electronic technology….at least you can keep in touch…and she is moving because of a good guy in her life too.

  7. goatbarnwitch said

    Good news and bad all rolled into one but ultimately the good outshines the bad. Maybe it is time to reconsider driving.. I know it is very hard to consider but it would open up such possibilities{{HUG}}

  8. Holly said

    ((hugs)) Isn’t it funny how some of the best news can also be some of the hardest to hear. Gotta love the internet at least you’ll still be able to have regualar contact.

  9. Ah, but she will always be your baby and you will always be her mamma. Grieve, but take heart in her happiness!

  10. Michael said

    Congratulations to Matt, and good luck to Rebecca, and sympathies to you. We are soooo lucky in my family that so far no one in the younger generations has moved more than half an hour away. (Well, most of the time it’s lucky. Sometimes it seems like a kind of mild curse.)

  11. Sunday said

    Yay! I agree with those who say it’s great that she’s moving because of a good reason AND on good terms! Think of it–you COULD have a daughter like me, full o’ heart problems and never leaving home (unless I get out of the secretarial thang and get a “real” job using either of my majors–music or psychology).

    But, yeah, it’s hard–it sucked when my sister left. I don’t care what they say about “being ready.” You aren’t even ready when you’re a sister, I can’t imagine being a parent! But think of it–you know that she’ll be in good hands and that she’s got a good head on her shoulders. Doesn’t make it any easier, but hey–you have that.

    (And you can always pester her constantly via e-mail and telephone!)

  12. Jim said

    A five hour train ride is better than a five hour automobile ride (assuming that the endpoint station is not 100 miles from your actual destination). You can get up and walk around on a train (okay, so the bathrooms are not so nice), visit the cafe car, etc. (Vast areas of the country does not really have any useful train service.) It is much better than trying to cover an equivalent distance by airplane (unless you’d be traveling by private jet).

    Best wishes for Rebecca and her significant other.

  13. yaketyyak said

    A five hour train ride might not be too bad for you, but it is hell for me. Those seats are murder on my back, and not so good for my muscle pain, either. I’m actually more comfortable in a car.

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