My Fifteen Minutes of Fame

A funny thing happened on the way to the forum yesterday…  My cousin, Kathy, came over to give me a birthday present, and suggested that we go get something to eat at our favorite Middle Eastern restaurant.  I hadn’t showered and was wearing cut off sweat pants and an old t-shirt.  I considered changing my clothes, but then thought, “Who’s going to see me on BLANK Ave?  It’s been a ghost town since the road construction started months ago.”

As it turns out, a lot of people saw me.  I ended up on the local news.

BLANK Ave. is a mess because of the seemingly never-ending road construction.  Because of that, many people are avoiding the area.  A reporter was doing a story about how the construction work is affecting businesses.  She interviewed the owner of the Middle Eastern restaurant, who said that sales are down 80%, and the utility company is threatening to turn off their electricity.    He then told her she should talk to me because of the extra trouble I had getting to the restaurant due to my sprained foot.  The next thing I knew, I was holding a microphone and being taped.

When I watched the clip on TV last evening, I laughed so hard my already sore ribs were aching even more.  It starts with a shot of me trying to get across the torn up obstacle course of a street, with curbing a foot and a half deep in some spots.  Then it shows me talking about how my cousin had to go ahead of me to check the depth of the curbs so she could let me know where I had the best chance of getting over the hurdles.  The clip ends with me saying that I hope the damage to the businesses isn’t irreversible, and that the people will come back to support the merchants on BLANK Ave.  It’s hilarious, and gave me a much-needed good laugh.

Another thing I’d like to mention is today’s Simple Abundance essay.  Sarah ban Breathnach writes about “meditative handwork.”  When our hands are busy, our minds can rest. She goes on to say, The next time the fabric of real life seems to unravel before your eyes, get busy with your hands so that your mind can serenely sort out where to pick up the next stitch.

I guess that explains my passion for knitting.   This is my latest project – a shawl/scarf, named a “sharf” by my brother, Mike.

In other news, I’m going away again for a couple of days.  We’re taking Leigh to school.  Orientation is on Friday.  Because check-in starts at 8:00 am, we’re going to spend Thursday night in a motel not far from the campus.  Leigh is scared stiff (being so far away from her boyfriend is her major concern), and I’m worried that she won’t give this experience a fair shot.  All good vibes and positive thoughts will be greatly appreciated.

Speaking of Leigh, when she came over to take me to dinner for my birthday, she found fleas on the dogs.  We immediately went to the veterinary clinic for supplies, which set me back $200.00.  I actually felt sick when I saw the bill.  Plus, the house and furniture (including mattresses) need a good vacuuming, and then everything has to be sprayed with this stuff the vet recommends over bombs. (That was only $15.)  Unfortunately, I can’t vacuum because of my sprained foot and Daniel is in Canada.  Another piece of fabric of real life is unraveling before my eyes.  I think I’ll go knit.

Happy birthday to 54 year old me.

Reading:  The Memory Keeper’s Daughter by Kim Edwards

Song of the Day:  Fame by David Bowie

Grieve Reprieve

Incredibly, Bowie rallied enough to receive a temporary stay of execution. The Ex will keep an eye on Bo-Bo, and re-evaluate the situation on a daily basis.   (An aside about the nickname, “Bo-Bo.”  Oddly enough, I also call Penny “Pen-Pen,” and Ellie is “Bell-Bell,” which evolved from “Ellie Belly.”  When she was little, my daughter, Leigh, was “Lee-Lee.”  I wonder why I do that…)  Anyway, it appears that the grieving can be put off for a little while longer.

In other news, I had an appointment with Dr. Spine Specialist on Wednesday.  I only had to sit in the waiting room for about 15 minutes before the nurse called me in, but then I waited for another half an hour in the examining room.  After he finally got around to seeing me, the doctor expressed surprise that I had Epidural Steroid injections.  Apparently, he referred me to pain management for Sacroiliac joint injections.   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! I went through that agony for nothing!

Unbelievable, huh?  Dr. SS suggested that I discuss SI injections when I see the pain management specialist later this month.  You bet I will.

He also recommended a “TENS unit (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulator).  The guy who handles that was busy with another patient, so I was told to go back to the waiting room until he was ready for me.  I sat there for half an hour.  Finally, the guy called me in and said he had to go get a unit to demonstrate how to use it.  He said he’d be right back.  Half an hour later, I got up and walked out.  I left him a note with my phone number.  He has not contacted me.

When I got home, I got started on the “lasagna gardening.”  I was out there for three hours, working on just one side of the lawn.  The heat was oppressive, and I was so weak and dizzy I actually keeled over.  I didn’t black out, but I did fall down.  That was my cue to pack it in.  Stupidly, I went back out the following morning to work on the other side of the lawn.  Since then, the lower back pain has been excruciating.

Thank goodness for my sister’s swimming pool.

If I have to be resting, it might as well be on a float surrounded by refreshing water.  I’m getting too much sun, but that should take care of my Vitamin D deficiency, at any rate…

Reading:  Tender is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Song of the Day:  Aching Back by Michael Pacholek (A parody of The Rolling Stones’ Paint it Black)

I see a line of pills, supposed to help my back
with aspirin and steroids, ease my coughing hack.
I pop ‘em in my mouth and wash ‘em down away.
Doesn’t work, my muscles ache, they hurt me every day.

It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times

First, the good stuff.  The Asian lilies I planted in the fall are blooming. This is noteworthy for someone like me who does not have a green thumb.

Sunday was my grandmother’s birthday, and she was so happy.  She said she hopes she lives to see 100.  I hope so, too.  Anyone who makes it to 97 deserves to  hit the big One Oh Oh.

Now for the sad news.  The ex called a little while ago to let me know that he made arrangements to have our dog, Bowie, put to sleep on Thursday.  We got him as a puppy almost 15 years ago.  That’s a long life for a big dog.   Unfortunately, the quality of his life has been declining.  He’s having trouble standing, and is in pain.  It’s time to put an end to his suffering.

This hurts.  A lot.  He was such a good boy, and I love him so much.

My heart is breaking.

Song of the Day:  Dog’s Life by Gentle Giant

Rash Bash

About a month ago, Penny developed a small lump on her right flank. After growing a bit larger, it erupted and scabbed over. I decided to just keep an eye on her before taking her to the vet. (Those visits are expensive!) When a few more bumps appeared on her head, I had to give in and make the call. She was seen yesterday, and the diagnosis is dermatitis caused by seasonal allergies. Sheesh. I’m supposed to bathe her twice a week, using a very pricey shampoo and leave-in conditioner.

Penny’s not the only one with skin problems. I’ve been trying to deal with an unbearably itchy rash for several days now. At first, I thought it was hives. But, after taking a closer look, I wasn’t so sure. The rash is less defined than hives, and widespread over both arms and legs. There is associated swelling. I am reminded of a sausage ready to burst from its casing. Or Ball Park franks. (They plump when you cook ‘em.)

I dropped by the health office at work yesterday and asked the nurse for her opinion. She held her hand above the rash on my upper arm (that’s where it’s the worst) and said it felt hot. She doesn’t think it’s hives, and said it looks more like an allergic reaction to medication. Oddly enough, the only medication I’ve taken recently is Benadryl (as a sleep aid). Wouldn’t it be something if a medication that is taken to relieve itchy rashes caused my itchy rash?

The nurse recommended that I see my doctor. I just happen to have an appointment with my rheumatologist this afternoon, so I’ll show her the rash and see if there’s anything she can do. I’d really rather not have to make an appointment with Dr. What Do You Want Me To Do if I can help it. Wish me luck!

Before I go get ready for work, I’d like to point you in the direction of a new blog created by my friend, LeAnn. Check her out. She’s good people.

Song of the Day: I’ve Got You Under My Skin by Diana Krall

Things That Go Bump in the Night

Becca and I did end up going to see the Bronx Zoo’s Holiday Lights Friday evening, and I’m so glad we did. It was a fun thing to do, even though we got lost in the Bronx for a while. Note to self – Stick with Yahoo directions, and never use Mapquest again.

We passed these cranes on our way into the park.

Here’s an elephant.

This is a close-up of a camel.

White-faced monkeys

These sheep in the petting zoo area cracked me up because they came running and jumped onto the fence when they saw us heading in their direction. I guess they were expecting a handout.

This is an ice carving in progress. Your guess is as good as mine as to what it’s supposed to be.

The pictures didn’t come out very well because I couldn’t figure out how to set my camera for night photos. Oh well, I still had a good time. And I scored a candy apple, which is always a special treat for me.

Moving right along to “things that go bump in the night.” I had a weird experience a few evenings ago. My sister and daughter were witnesses, otherwise I might doubt my own eyes and ears.

Michele and I were sitting in the family room, and Rebecca was coming down the stairs from the upper floor of our house. Suddenly, we heard the sound of shattering glass. Rebecca and I checked all the rooms on the upstairs level. Then we checked the main level. When we didn’t find anything, we went down to the basement.

There, at the foot of the stairs, we found the remains of a vintage mason jar. The jar didn’t belong to me, but I did notice it when we first moved into the house. It was on a shelf on the far side of the basement – nowhere near the stairs.

After puzzling over the situation for a while, my sister and I shrugged it off as just one of those things. We went back upstairs, leaving Rebecca behind to get her clothes from the dryer.

A few minutes later, while I was typing something on the computer for my mother, I heard the sound of four, distinct footsteps coming up the basement stairs. In a shaky voice, Michele asked, “What was that??”  I replied, “It must be Rebecca.” Michele said, “Rebecca is right here!” I turned around and saw Rebecca standing there, with wide eyes and a face drained of blood.

Even though we were all pretty freaked out at that point, we went to the door that leads to the basement stairs, and opened it. There was nothing there.

Shortly after that, Rebecca left for work, and Michele had to leave soon afterwards. Being here alone for the half hour or so before Daniel got home was pretty spooky.

I’m still not sure what to think about the eerie episode. This house is ninety-nine years old. Could it be that we have a poltergeist in residence? Who ya gonna call?

Song of the Day: Ghostbusters  by Ray Parker Jr.

Not So Sweet Dreams

The other night, I dreamt that I was standing outside at dawn, watching thousands of bats fly into my house.  My hands were on my face, and the words “Oh my God” came out of my mouth over and over.

This is what the bats looked like.

*Photo courtesy of Allposters.com.

This is what I looked like.

*Photo courtesy of homepage.newschool.edu.

Song of the Day:  Welcome To My Nightmare  by Alice Cooper

Reading:  Ten Days in the Hills by Jane Smiley, Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert and To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee

Creature Feature

Apparently, the bats have spread the message that our house is a good place for freeloaders to set up residence. We can now add mice to our unwelcome guest list.

Daniel came across a baby yesterday, and I ran into the mama today. Baby was trapped in a butterfly net and removed to the back yard, but mama got away.

I don’t like having to worry about critters scurrying across the floor in front of me (or flying around over my head, for that matter) every time I step into a room.

Furthermore, recent wildlife sightings in my back yard include woodchucks, a mama and baby deer, a skunk, and a raccoon. A couple of months ago, a bear was seen (and photographed) on the road at the end of my street.

For the record, I live in the city, not the country.

This is getting ridiculous.

Song of the Day: Worst Comes to Worst by Bats and Mice (That’s a real band!)

Ice For My Head

After months of relief (which is highly unusual), I had dared to hope that the worst of all my ailments might never darken my doorstep again. I’m talking about Scary Headache Syndrome.

Unfortunately, the headaches are back. With a vengeance.

To add insult to injury, my coffeemaker died yesterday morning. I was afraid I would have to deal with a caffeine withdrawal headache on top of the scary headache, but Daniel came to the rescue and got me a cup of coffee from the corner store. Phew. One crisis averted.

It doesn’t end there, though. I also have a very itchy rash from the horribly invasive Bishop’s weed that runs rampant over our property. The itch drove me crazy our first summer in this house, but I managed to avoid it last year. Sadly, I wasn’t as lucky this summer. 

I did an Internet search to see if I could find any suggestions on how to relieve the itch, or stop the rash from spreading. This site recommends careful handling of the plant “as the sap may bring about a skin rash or irritation that can be very serious and painful… If symptoms occur after contact with plant, call your local Poison Control Center. ” Geez.

I’m not the only one who’s suffering. Our doxie, Penny Lane, is going through a false pregnancy.

The fun never ends around here.

Song of The Day: Headache by Sublime

This song is dedicated to whatever is causing my scary headaches:

Sometimes it’s just so hard
To put up with you
I’ve come to rely on a pill or two
‘Cause you cause me such pain
Why does it act this way?
I’m so frustrated with everything
Won’t you be nice?
Bring some ice for my head?

Going Batty

The reign of terror started early this year. Last summer, the bats didn’t put in an appearance until the middle of August. This year, our first visitor made its presence known on July 9^th.

I was awakened from a sound sleep at 3:45 a.m. when Rebecca burst into our bedroom to announce that a bat was flying around downstairs. Daniel went down and opened the front door. We think (and hope!) it took the hint and went out.

Last summer, we called a Pest Control/Wildlife Removal company for an estimate. They wanted THREE THOUSAND DOLLARS to bat-proof our house. I took note of all the places the representative pointed out as possible entry points – inside and out. Then I had my brother, Mike, come over to do the inside sealing, at a small fraction of the cost. We didn’t get around to the outside of the house because I had been advised to wait until late November to ensure that the bats had left for their winter home. My brother, Mark, died in October, and bats were the last thing on my mind.

When I did give the issue some thought, I figured it would be okay as long as the inside of the house was sealed against bat access. I guess we missed something. Very heavy sigh.

I don’t care so much if the bats hang out in my attic, but I don’t want to share my living space with them. It’s going to be a loooooong summer.

Effing bats.

Song of the Day: Bats in the Belfry by Dispatch

A Quickie

Not much has been happening lately. I’m just gearing up for another whirl on the medical merry-go-round. Tomorrow I have physical therapy. On Wednesday, I return to the neurosurgeon for a review of the flexion/extension x-rays. Then I suspect he’s going to refer me to an orthopedic surgeon. Thursday I have an appointment with a podiatrist, and Friday it’s back to PT. Yawn.

That is not a yawn of boredom; it’s a yawn of fatigue. I’ve been feeling deeply exhausted for most of the day - even moreso than usual. Before I succumb to the lethargy, I want to show you my yard sale bargain. Eight dollars for the chair, and five for the table.

I would also like to let LA’s readers know that she doesn’t have Internet access at present, but hopes to be back online soon.

And, finally, Bex (http://crowcottage.wordpress.com/2007/06/10/) could use some good thoughts right about now. Her beloved pet, the beautiful Whitby, died yesterday, on what should have been her 8^th birthday. My heartfelt condolences, Bex and Paul.